Did you hear? Apparently we’re good at soccer now. Must be true, seeing as our boys just beat the world’s top-ranked team in a real, live tournament.

And, oh yeah, soccer is going to be huge in America now. For real this time.

I’ll see you on the pitch this afternoon, right?

Well, probably not.

If you’re having trouble figuring out what all this means, here’s the short version: This past week, the U.S. soccer team beat Spain — the No. 1 national team in FIFA’s world rankings — in something called the Confederations Cup.

After the final whistle, the win was hailed by some as a major win in a major tournament against a majorly fearsome team.

This supposedly means two things. First, the U.S. is now a contender in world soccer. Second, the sport is finally going to be popular in America.

It all sounds really nice. Too bad none of it’s true.

First of all, this is still soccer we’re talking about. And this is still America we’re living in.

While the win did send the U.S. team into the final of the Confederations Cup, and it did also create some water-cooler buzz this week, it did nothing to change America’s relationship with soccer.

The U.S. team is still mediocre, at best, and soccer will remain a niche sport in America.

And that won’t even change if the Red, White and Blue beat Brazil today in the championship game.

As proud and as patriotic as the win over Spain made us all feel, let’s go ahead and call it exactly what it was: An upset. A classic upset by an underdog against a superior team. Nothing more. Nothing less.

A couple months from now, all will go back to normal. The U.S. team will go back to World Cup qualifying, and soccer will reclaim its normal place as a minor sport in America. A small, dedicated group of people — which includes this writer — will continue to follow the game, regardless of how the U.S. national team fares.

The rest will go back to watching baseball until football season starts.

And it’s probably just as well, anyway. Even with the win over Spain, the U.S. national soccer team is nowhere near competing with the big boys, as some would lead you to believe.

Just recently, they got trounced at Costa Rica in World Cup qualifying. A few days later they struggled to beat mighty Honduras at home.

And when they first got to South Africa for the Confederations Cup, it wasn’t any better. First, Italy clobbered the U.S. 3-1. Then Brazil went one better, winning 3-0 over the Stars and Stripes.

Lost in all the hullabaloo is the fact that the U.S. only advanced to the semifinals of the tournament because of a fluky 3-0 win over Egypt. Look it up online, it’s actually a pretty funny — but not family-friendly — story.

So which is it? Is the real U.S. team the one that beat Spain? Or is it the one that lost its first two games at the tournament — and faces a real struggle every four years to qualify for the World Cup?

Here’s guessing it’s the latter. And here’s also saying that’s okay for now.

Let’s just hope the upsets continue next time they’re in South Africa — next year for the World Cup. Even if nobody back home is watching.

‰ Michael Cummings can be reached by e-mail at michaelc@cullmantimes.com or by telephone at 734-2131, ext. 258.